So.

LJ?

It's not you. It's me.

Really.

We've been playing this game for years. I love you and love you, spend hours perfecting your new layout, write hundreds of characters of text...

And then leave you alone in the cold while I run off with Blogger, Twitter, and Facebook.

I know it's not right, I really do.

But the truth is... I've been using you.

I just wanted you so I could read my LJ friend's entries.

Sure it started out as a real, healthy, relationship. But, It stopped being that a long time ago.

So, for the sake of everyone involved, I think I should probably say good-bye.

I'll still pop in from time to time, as I've been known to do, just to read my friends entries. But, I really don't see me writing anything else here.

Please don't hate me. I truly do want to remain friends.

XOXO

~*Aubrey*

Listen to my station on Blip.fm!

There hasn't been much to say in the way of updating recently. But,I really feel like a slacker when I see that the last real update I gave was before Christmas.

Lame.

Which segues beautifully into what I intend to say.

My word for 2008, the word I slipped into almost every conversation, and consequently got a handful of other people to start saying was 'Lame'.

I liked it, it fit me.

But now that it is 2009 I have to come up with another word. Because I can't simply carry on with my old and out-of-style 2008 word.

That would just be tragic.

Which once again segues me into what I want to talk about... My word for 2009 (while still up for grabs) is looking to be 'tragic'.

We'll see.

Other things to accompany the new year:

~An aversion to fast food. (That's right, no more Taco Bell, Wendy's, or McDonald's (RIP Big and Beautiful Big Mac...) Lame. (Er, Tragic...))
~Christmas decorations that are still up. (Seriously people, it's tragic. And I'm too lazy to even attempt taking them down myself.)
~New class at UVU (That I WILL be attending! Psychology is just so my thing.)
~Potential change in majors (Psychology is just so my thing.)
~Me, getting more sleep. (HOORAY! (Except, why do I have LESS energy?))

And in keeping with my "Resolutions" (I really don't want to call them that.) I have had not a bit of fast food since the beginning of the year.

Except yesterday.

Yesterday I broke down and got some Taco Bell.

And promptly felt violently ill.

So, today I was a better master of my cravings.



And got this instead. (Photo taken with the brand new shiny camera Santa gifted me with this year. Santa rocks!)

Seriously. (Maybe 'seriously' is my word for 2009?) I'd take Strawberry Shortcake over the Bell any day.

It's tons better for you.

And the best part is I bought some tortillas and apples today, so I can make some apple quesadillas later.

I know, I'm pretty amazing.

*Post title from Running Away by Midnight Hour

Dear Snow,

Many thanks for finally getting the weather right.

When you came down so hard the Monday before Christmas (and subsequently made me park my car the better part of the week) I must admit that I cursed your name to the highest of the Heavens...

When you caused the poor pizza delivery girl's car to get caught in our driveway, I was mildly amused, and then bitter that I had to work for my food.

And when you caused such a dense fog on my way to work on Wednesday, I wished you the same death and destruction you almost caused me.

I admit it was touch-and-go this week. You started out with such abandon that I was afraid for another week of bitter cold and death-trap drives to work.

But, it seems you've gotten it figured out. If it's possible, I'd like to order another 4 or 5 weeks of this week's weather. If it must be winter, then I believe it should always be this way; just cold enough to keep the snow on the grass, but warm enough to stop ice from forming on the roads and walkways. (A girl can dream!)

Oh, and my conscience informs me that I should probably THANK you for making me park my car. If I had been driving it on the interstate when it went kaput, then I may have been in a sticky spot. I'll take the alternative to having it die while sitting in front of my house.

But, I have half a mind to charge you the 250 dollars it cost me to repair it.

With Love,

~*Aubrey*~

P.S. I caught a glimpse of your cousin, rain, the other day. I don't think he comes by often enough. So, see what you can do about that. Please!

*Post Title from Self-Conclusion by The Spill Canvas

An incredibly huge sorry for clogging up your friends page.

I regularly (well, more regularly) update on my blogspot. I just kept feeling that i was leaving my LJ friends in the dark.

So, i'll have to be better about cross-posting in the future.

And please feel free to check out what I've been up to.

WAAAAY too much.

I can be happy alone, sure.

I can be happy without ice cream, too.

If we're being hypothetical.

Taken from "A Softer World"

Here's how I'm spending my morning.



This and the parade on TV.

Let me one of the first to welcome you a happy and wonderful Thanksgiving!

I hope you get to spend today with those you love and care for, and you get to spend a bit of time partaking of the spirit of thanksgiving.

And food.

Enjoy lots of food like this:



My amazing home-made cranberry sauce.

Recipe available HERE

Now, I'm going to go back to the Thanksgiving Parade. (First time I've been able to watch it in 6 years.)

So, Thanksgiving.

Maligned holiday.

Personally, I think the world would benefit from spending more time focusing on what we have to be thankful for.

But the spirit of the world right now is one of demand. We want to get what we need speedily, and anything slightly less than our expectations is unacceptable.

Greed and want has seeped into every facet of existence: Entertainment, Food, Work, and even Religion.

Set aside a moment to reflect deeply on your own life, and how your may or may not have fallen into the same "On Demand" attitude that the rest of us have found ourselves in.

Take the time to be patient.

And spend the extra waiting time reflecting on what you are grateful for.

And REALLY reflect. The same carbon-copy sentiments that you use flippantly elsewhere cannot apply here.

You may be surprised at what you discover about yourself, and what you may or may not have known about what you have to be grateful for.

Just food for thought.

*Twilight Vampire Cookies recipe up HERE

**Post Title is pulled from one of my favorite songs. (All of my post titles are significant) So, I am introducing my new favorite part of my blog. "Title Inspiration" I will try when I can to post a link that enables the reader to see/hear/partake in the object that inspired my post title.

Listen to "For All We Know" by Further Seems Forever at YOUTUBE

And in celebration,



I MADE COOKIES!!!

I am a thorough enjoyer.

Meaning: I enjoy everything that I enjoy to the very last drop. I milk that drink until even a scotchman's whistle brooks no result. (And for the definition of a scotchman's whistle, you'll have to look up my grandpa. (Or I could tell you it's the annoying sound produced when someone sucks on their straw and there is very little beverage left. (SSLUUUURP! (Yay! Parenthesis!))))

I sit at a sports game until the end of the last inning (quarter (whatever)), I wait at concerts until the very last encore is over and the lights come up. Then, since I waited, I become one of the herd. (You know, the mass exodus of thosands of bodies that once occupied such a small area that the movement of all of them threatens to disrupt the rotation of the earth itself.)

I wait until the very end of a television program before switching channels, or turning the television off. For that I have to suffer through the last set of commercials to get the very last 30 seconds of television that is neither important, nor substantial. (But catastrophic to miss!)

That's just how I roll.

So, my dear reader(s), are you the stay-and-enjoy type of people or the cut-out-to-beat-the-crowd type?

HOLY S@$%!!!! (Edited because mommies and children read this blog, (seriously) Not that I'd actually say it anyway. (I just like to pretend I'm all bad, but I'm not. (I'm pretty lame, acutally. (And I really like parenthesis.(Am I using these right?))))))

HOLY FREAKIN' COW! (<--- Clicky!)

Comes out May 8th (Sorry, Mom! Know how excited you are... :D)

I haven't been a huge supporter of this movie in the past, but I'm starting to lean the other way.

I mean j.j. abrams did bring us Lost, and as frustrating as THAT show is, it still has this knack of sucking me in.

So. Well played, Mr Abrams. Well played. You got me interested in James Kirk again.

Yesterday.

I locked myself in my room, yesterday.

I slept from 3 PM to 4 AM, with minimal interruptions inbetween.

No fuss, No drama, just sleep.

Just me.

Attempting peace with my own thoughts.

I can't tell if I succeeded, but I am rested.

And hopeful.

I know what it means; The little blinking cursor in the top left corner of the window.

Nothing to say.

Nothing significant.

Am I alright? Would I be able to tell if I weren't?

Is this feeling of suffocating, of drowning in nothing, normal?

What is normal? Does it really matter as much as people think?

And why am I waiting?

Why am I not fighting?

Why am I not clawing, digging, scratching and kicking my way to relief?

To air?

To life?

I choose to wallow.

Because I've transcended beyond the point of caring,

About anything,

I choose to wait.

What am I waiting for?

I think...

I think it's greatness.

Or life.

I'm waiting for life to start.

To pick up.

To go somewhere worthwhile.

And for the demons to go away.

For the man-made shadows to disappear behind every smile.

And then maybe for once I can finally believe someone when they smile and say "I'm glad I know you," or "I like you".

And then maybe one day I can believe I don't have to try so hard to win or earn love and respect.

I'm a perfectionist.

I have to be.

Because if everything wasn't perfect...

NO ONE WOULD LOVE ME

I performed my civic duty, today. And I have to say that I'm happy to announce that this is probably the first year that I've really taken it seriously.

I can't say I've followed it very closely, because sometimes politics makes my brain explode, but I do feel that I have a firmer understanding of the issues. I've shucked the umbrella of my parent's/family's beliefs and stood strongly on my own feet.

I believe what I believe, and that may or may not be what you believe.

Anyway, that's not really what I intended to say when I started this.

I have been entirely too lucky in all of my voting endeavors, and today didn't change anything. In every election I've voted in, I've not had to wait in any lines, I've been in and out and got my sexy sticker in a handful of minutes. It took me 4 minutes today.

I feel a little bad, because there have been reports from other parts out east where the waiting line is 5 to 7 hours long. I really feel sorry for those cities and counties. Obviously they haven't been paying attention to the news. Otherwise they'd have no reason not to have braced themselves for a greater turnout this election. Remember all those young people (And according to CNN all the black people) who couldn't be bothered to vote?

Yeah, they're coming out this time.

And you poor election officials didn't arrange for enough ballot machines. Goobers.

Now some people are just giving up and turning away, because if they were tentative of voting before, a hefty 5 hour line is not going to convince them to stay.

Anyway, I have been watching CNN since 1, and I'll probably keep it on because I can't seem to make myself turn it off. I made myself brownies, I've got the roomies' lappy, and a few blankets...

I'm set for awhile.

Now... Fox News or CNN?

If my life were made into an epic movie (loosely based on real events), my character would die a heroically tragic death. Like saving someone from a bus, pushing them out of the way, only to be hit myself. Or maybe she would choose to end her own story. To stay in control, that sort of thing.

I just feel that would be the way to go. No fanfare, no drama, just simplicity.

Damien Rice's "Sleep Don't Weep" would play in the background, and the heroine's legend would outlive her own frail humanity.

Yes, random.

That's how I roll.

Installed Opera Mini on my Blackberry. It won't load web-pages, it times out. This could be because the roaming icon has been on on my phone for the last day or so, but I've received and sent calls, texts, and data from my default browser.

It could be that Opera hates me.

You just walked out the door,
Heavy heart, eyes turned to the floor.
I took it well, but I can tell,
Maybe you wanted more.

I wanted to scream,
To make a scene,
I think I'm tired of living
In this Existential Dream.

With eyes wide shut,
I'm living with all you got,
and none of me.

My life is just exposition,
Your inquisition,
What am I fighting for?

To end my report on my busy week(s) in October I have a handful of things to mention.

I went to a haunted house.

Aimee, Heather, and I set out for adventure a week ago and found ourselves at the Scream Asylum in Provo. Now, I typically don't get scared at those things, and this one was your basic plain Jane scare tactics. But, I have this irrational fear that gets me every time.

The chainsaw men.

Holy Cow, this one had two coming at you at the same time from different sides of the room. You have nowhere to run. At least this year there were no puddles of mud to (un)gracefully fall into.

On the 24th, I attended a Masquerade.



Don't let my austere fact fool you, It was a blast. All proceeds went to help support our troops, and there was quite a good turnout. I even won a raffle. (I'll be at Applebee's claiming my free entrees soon.... :D)

Aimee, Heather, Charise, and I sure had fun dressing up, and then leaving early because we were just too tired. That's just how we roll.

On Saturday my roommate's stake was having a huge activity at Spring Haven lodge in Hobble Creek, so we decided we'd go rock the party.



Me, in my sexy/emo/nerd herd outfit. I rocked the place.



Me and Penelope/Old Bag Lady taking our picture in the bathroom. It was the only mirror we could find...



Charise and I chumming it up.

So that about sums up my totally killer week(s). I do have more to mention about my Saturday at the Cougar stadium, but I figure that that particular endeavor involves a lot of story.

So, I'll just end this here.

How has your October been?

I have more updates of my fantastic week. (Only posting them the next week. So, not too far behind.)

About a week and a half ago, I went to my very first corn maze. I'm pretty amazing, I know.

And I even have proof... :D

( Lots of pics... )

It is okay to care about privacy even if you aren't a criminal.

Because maybe you just aren't a criminal yet.

Week in review part deux later today.

This will be the fourth time I've attempted to sit down and update. I can't really explain where the time went.

But, I have been busy.

I survived a grueling week at work where I basically ran the department by myself. The supervisor went on vacation and I was playing the wonderful act of just trying not to drown in all the work.

But I found time for fun.

Thursday dinner turned out beautifully. I switched with Deven for dinner, and pulled off a wonderful spread.



And just in case you didn't salivate on that last picture... here's a close-up of the scrumptious raspberry walnut salad.



And it was all very easy.

CROCK POT CHICKEN
4 chicken breasts
2 cans cream of chicken or cream of mushroom (or mixture of both)
1 8 oz pkg of cream cheese, cubed
1 pkg Italian or Ranch seasoning

Throw it all in the crock pot in the order listed, and cook on low for 6 hours.

(It will look something like this...)



Give it a quick stir and serve with either rice or mashed potatoes (<--- I completely endorse that option...)

Voila! Easy Peasy, and everyone will be salivating. (If you don't tell them how easy it is, then they will never know.) You can add more chicken if the size of your slow cooker will allow it, the sauce-to-chicken ratio doesn't seem to matter, but be prepared to have people complaining that there isn't enough sauce to go around. I use it like it's gravy, so I love to have a lot.